I. Everyone's A Superhero

Friday, I got up from my chair and went to the ladies room, where I did lady-things, washed my hands and returned less than two minutes later to find someone had carpeted my cubicle with bubblewrap. I did the only thing a person can in this situation: I jumped up and down and squealed with glee. For the next hour, my co-workers heard only:

POP POP POP POP POP!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[silence]

POP POP POP POP POP!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

This attracts a crowd.

Lupe: What's...what's going on?
Tata: I walked away from my desk and I came back and there was bubblewrap and see - see - see -

POP POP POP POP POP!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Tata: It's the best prank ever!

Finally, Mathilde, who did not escape ethnic genocide and seek asylum to be driven mad by shipping supplies, turns the corner and demands the bubblewrap. She lets me keep one sheet to play with, preferably when she's not there. Mathilde shares a cube with another woman; I recently informed them that every day at 2 p.m. I hear them laughing. The whole office was dumbstruck, but after a few days realized it was true, and when it wasn't, someone would send them a joke. Thus, my record as a prognosticator remains unblemished: at 2, there will be laughter in the land. Or else. And then there will be laughter in the land!

Well, sort of.

...Monday...
Lisa: You're coming to my birthday dinner.
Tata: I'm not!
Lisa: We're going to the Moroccan place. You're coming!
Tata: I'm not!
Lisa: We'll see.

...Wednesday...
Lisa: You're coming to my birthday dinner.
Tata: I'm not!
Lisa: We're going to dance! You love dancing.
Tata: I'm not going!
Lisa: We'll see.

...Friday...
Lisa: You're coming to my birthday dinner.
Tata: I'm not!
Lisa: Siobhan will pick up up at 7:30 Saturday night, whether or not you're dressed and ready. She will be armed, so just get in the car. The food will be delicious. You will have a good time. You're coming!
Tata: Huh! I guess I am.

Damn it!

Part II.