The Money's Gone Nowhere To Go

What's a comic to do when the humor writes itself?

The speech, which will be broadcast live from Wakefield High School in Arlington County, was planned as an inspirational message "entirely about encouraging kids to work hard and stay in school," said White House spokesman Tommy Vietor. Education Secretary Arne Duncan sent a letter to principals nationwide encouraging them to show it.

But the announcement of the speech prompted a frenzied response from some conservatives, who called it an attempt to indoctrinate students, not motivate them.

Omigod, conservatives now respond to stuff that hasn't happened yet, like they've just come back from the fuuuuuutuuuuuure armed with a pre-buttal.

Jim Greer, chairman of the Florida Republican Party, said the speech is an effort to "spread President Obama's socialist ideology" and "justify his positions" on health care, the economy and taxes. Conservative columnist Michelle Malkin claimed that "the left has always used kids in public schools as guinea pigs and as junior lobbyists for their social liberal agenda."

I KNOW! I had no idea CBS was writing satire!

Okay okay okay. Breathe, two, three, four. Okay, first: Presidents of the United States sometimes talk to the kids.





How'd that work out for us? Just another day at the office? No history-changing law-breaking by an American administration followed, right?



Okay, maybe Republican presidents shouldn't talk to children.